


to plant and to grow

by princelogical



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Drugs, Gen, High School, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Self-Harm, mentions of drug abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-03
Updated: 2016-08-03
Packaged: 2018-07-29 03:18:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7668139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princelogical/pseuds/princelogical
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis' secret? He doesn't want it to be senior year; he wants to go back in time, because things are getting heavy. He's almost an adult now and nothing feels okay anymore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	to plant and to grow

Louis isn’t expecting anything interesting to happen today. His fourth year of high school is slowly drawing to a close and everyone is either busy prepping for final exams or curled in a corner crying over final exams. Whatever they’re doing, it has to do with getting ready for finals.

The most exciting thing to happen over the last week was Nerdy Niall’s (an unfortunate nickname used universally to describe the high-strung, super smart boy), huge breakdown in the middle of the cafeteria. It was the talk of the entire school. Students stood outside the school with signs in protest to the “highly stressful atmosphere surrounding examination time.” Louis shouldn’t find it as funny as he does.

Louis currently sits in the public library studying. This was the last day until exams started up, meaning he had procrastinated (again), and will probably pass the exams with a lovely C (again). Then his parents will sigh at him then give the long lecture about university. Louis doesn’t fancy going to a university, but… his parents are putting in a whole lot of money for him to go, so he figures he ought to just suck it up and go.

Because it would be pretty selfish if he didn’t, right? Even though it is supposed to be his life, but… Louis doesn’t like going down that road, the one leading to thinking about his future and being an _adult_.

At least twelve books of varying sizes are strewn across the big table where no one besides him sits. He is in the best library in town- Kennedy Kaje Public Library. The place is huge and open 24/7. It is every book nerd’s (namely Liam’s), dream. Not Louis’, however. He is by no means exited to be here studying something he should have done weeks ago.

Of course, his best friend Liam had started studying months before exams were even mentioned. When Louis had mentioned that he need to meet at the library to study Liam had groaned and complained Louis’ ear off. _You shouldn’t have put it off like this Louis! Don’t you even realise how important these exams are?_ After he made that statement, he reluctantly ( _very_ reluctantly), agreed to meet Louis and help him study.

He is late, Louis thinks to himself as he looks down at his watch. He slams his head down on the table in some thick book. He’s pretty sure it is maths, but then again, with the amount of attention he has been paying to the text, it could easily be some sex education book or something of that nature.

He’s just about to pull out his phone and send a very angry text to Liam when he hears books slam down on the table. Looking up, he expects to see Liam but a much younger looking boy meets his eyes. He is quite tall with bright green eyes and a sort of baby face. His hair is almost shoulder length and the curliest Louis has ever seen. The grey sweater he wears has it’s sleeves rolled up to his elbows and black skinny jeans paint his legs. The nervous and rushed air about him gives Louis the impression that he is a freshman. Nearly all the freshman are nervous about everything.

"I need your help," he says randomly. Louis raises an eyebrow at the boy’s very serious expression. He looks more like they are having a business meeting than a casual conversation in the library.

“That’s quite a lovely way to start a conversation, but how about you take a seat and start over?” Louis suggests with his lips curled into a small smirk.

The guy looks a bit taken aback, but then pulls out a chair across from Louis and sits down. He folds his long fingers together and rests his chin upon them. “Are you Liam? Liam Payne?” he asks.

Louis has to stifle the urge to laugh. Nobody has ever mistaken him for Liam before. The two are practically polar opposites. Liam is responsible and mature. Louis is irresponsible and acts like a two year old stuck in an eighteen year old’s body. “No, mate.”

“Great,” the guy snaps quietly. Louis gets the feeling he really didn’t want Louis to hear that. He drops his forehead into cupped hands and groans

“Why’re you looking for him?”

The guy peeks up from his fingers. “Niall told me-“

“You’re friends with Nerdy Niall?” He’s not surprised that Niall has friends (okay, maybe a little), just that he’s friends with a freshman. (Yes, Louis is making assumptions here, but it’s a talent, thank you very much.)

The guy’s hands slap down against the table and his frown turns from worried to angry in .5 seconds. “He’s not nerdy.”

“Sorry… Just a little nickname-“

“He doesn’t like it,” he says, crossing his arms.

“Oh,” Louis says. “What’s your name?”

Curly looks taken aback at the question. “Uhm… Harry. You?”

“Louis. So… Niall told you…?” Louis trails off hoping Harry will finish.

Harry doesn’t disappoint. “Niall told me Liam has my notes. I gave them to Niall- Niall gave them to Liam.” Harry looks like he isn’t exactly happy with Niall’s decision to pass around his notes like a party favour. “So I have to find Liam, because Niall is currently sentenced to bed rest. And the way Niall described Liam… Brown hair, fringe… I thought you were him. Sorry I bothered you.” Harry stands and reaches for his books.

“Wait! Liam’s coming here to help me study. He can give you your notes.”

Harry sighs then sits back down. “Okay.”

“How’s Nerdy Niall?”

“Just Niall,” Harry says.

“How’s just Niall?”

Harry smiles slightly. “He’s okay, but he stressed himself really bad. He’s just stuck in bed for a week.”

“Got it. Give him my wishes.”

“Sure.”

“So, are you a freshman?”

Harry looks slightly offended. “Sophmore.”

Not much of a difference, Louis thinks. “Oh, whoops. I’m a senior. So, if you’re a sophomore, why is Liam borrowing your notes?”

“I’m advanced maths…”

“Wow, that’s really cool!”

Harry nods. He doesn’t say anything and keeps anxiously glancing towards to direction of the entrance.

“He’ll be here soon. He’s usually not late,” Louis says.

“Okay,” Harry replies though he looks super antsy.

Finally, Louis sees Liam making his way through the shelves, a backpack draping over his shoulder. His hair is soaking wet and the expression he wears is cranky. Louis has a feeling he knows why. He braces himself for the lecture.

“ _Louis Tomlinson_ , this is the last and I mean _last_ time I am ever doing this for you. You are so… so irresponsible!”

“Thanks, Liam,” Louis says meekly. Liam rolls his eyes and sits the backpack down on the table.

“Zayn’s meeting us in a half hour by the way.” Louis doesn’t say anything, but he and Zayn don’t really get along. Zayn is one of the “bad boys” of the school that drives Louis mad. They smoke cigarettes right in front of the building, wear stupid leather jackets and have the whole too-cool-for-school thing down as they barely attend one class a week. Louis was always surprised when he’d hear Zayn’s name called for the honour roll over the past three years.

Liam seems to finally notice Harry. “Hey,” Liam says. Louis can tell he’s making an effort to be nicer, seeing as how he doesn’t know the guy. “What’s your name?”

“Harry,” he says. “Uhm, Niall said you have my notes.”

“Niall?” Liam frowns. “Niall Horan? Senior, in Mrs. Brady’s homeroom?”

“Yeah, that’s him.”

“Yeah, I think I have them.” Liam begins digging in his pack. “You studying with us, Harry?”

“Uhm, no. I’m gonna go over these at the house.”

“Ya sure?” Louis pipes in. “Liam’s a great last-minute tutour.”

Liam glares. “I am _not_ a tutour.”

“Please?” Louis asks.

Harry gives a tight smile. “I have to get to work.”

Liam raises an eyebrow, pulling out a plastic green binder and hands it to Harry. “Teenagers aren’t allowed to work nights.” Louis gives a subtle glance to his watch. 10:00PM. Yeah, Harry is definitely trying to get out of hanging out with them.

Harry coughs uncomfortably. “It’s a different kind of job,” he mumbles.

Louis doesn’t understand at all and is kind of creeped out by the tone of Harry’s voice. “C’mon, mate, please?” Louis whines out. Liam shoves his arm.

“Harry, don’t feel pressured. Louis’ just a prat.”

Harry gives another tight smile. “I guess I can stay for a little bit.”

“So, we working in silence or…?” Louis asks.

Liam sighs. “You don’t get anything done with silent work. I brought flash cards.”

“Can I marry you, Liam?”

“Quit being an idiot,” he says and pulls out a stack of rubber-banded flash cards.

Out of the corner of his eye he watches Harry flick open the binder and begin reading. He watches Harry open one of the books from the stacks and begin glancing from the book to the notes. His staring fest is interrupted with Liam shoving his arm again.

“C’mon, we have 200 flashcards to go over. And that’s just in history.”

“Two hundred!” Louis cries. “Is that necessary?”

Liam looks livid. “This is a library,” he hisses. He flicks up on of the cards. “Let’s start.”

Louis stares at the flashcard in frustration. “It’s on the answer side, Liam.”

Liam groans and slapped the card down on the table. “Fine, we’ll review the books. You can use my notes. Then we’ll try flash cards.”

“You’re a hero, Li.”

“Shut up and read,” Liam mumbles as he shoves Louis a red notebook with a ripped cover.

“Fancy.”

“Shut up.”

A loud thump cuts through the quiet atmosphere. Louis sighs. Zayn has arrived. And he is early. Lovely.

“What’s up?”

Louis flicks open the notebook and glares down at the pages.

“Hey, Zayn. You studying?”

Louis hears Zayn snort. “Nah, I’m just hanging with you and Louis and-“ he cuts off. Louis’ eye flint from the book to where Zayn looks expectantly at a preoccupied Harry.

Harry finally notices the silence then looks up. “Oh, uhm, Harry.”

Zayn nods. Louis finally looks up and nearly gags in disgust at the cigarette tucked behind his ear. “How do they let you go around with that thing- you’re a minour.”

Liam groans. Zayn looks surprised. He doesn’t reply just slowly sinks into a seat and pulls out his phone. Liam is still glaring at Louis so he hides his face behind the notebook again.

“Er, I think I’m gonna head to work now,” Harry says awkwardly. He scoops up his books and the binder. Zayn lowers his phone with a frown and Liam is now pulling his annoying parental look of concern.

“Need a ride?” Zayn offers. Harry shakes his head.       

“I can drive you,” Louis pipes up.

“No, you’re studying,” Liam snaps. He looks to Harry. “I can give you a ride if you need one, mate.”

“Nah, I’m good. I uhm- I drove.”

Zayn raises an eyebrow as if disbelieving, which Louis finds incredibly rude.

“All right, see you around,” Liam says. Harry gives an awkward wave and walks off.

Louis whips his eyes toward Zayn. “Did you really have to look at him like he’s a criminal?”

“Louis!” Liam warns.

Zayn simply looks back down at his phone. “I wasn’t, mate. It’s just that the kid doesn’t own a car.”

“And how would you know?”

“He doesn’t have a license.”

“And you would know… how?”

Zayn sighs and lowers his phone once more. “I just know.”

Liam looks worried. “He’s walking in the rain then?”

Zayn laughs and Louis can’t help but chuckle as well. “Oh, Li,” Louis says. “You’re just too good.

^--^

If Louis is being completely honest, he was not expecting to see Harry again. The universe seems to be playing with him however, for as he makes his way into the library after school (Liam’s new nerdy meeting place), he sees Harry pouring over a book at a table. He wears a different sweater (this one a dark blue), and the same jeans. A bruise paints over his left eye and both are half closed. His chin rests on a cupped hand. Louis can see it coming before it even happens and is lucky enough to grab Harry before he falls off the chair and tumbles to the floor.

“You look awful,” Louis comments. Harry smiles dryly.

“I didn’t sleep much last night,” Harry says. He points to his eye. “Slammed into the tree in front of my house.”

“Wow, mate. So, what are you doing here?” He tries not to sound rude, but he is pretty sure he failed.

“Studying,” he says gesturing to the book.

“More exams?” Louis asks.

Harry nods. They are interrupted by Liam setting down his bag on the table and sitting down.

“Hello Louis. Harry.” He glances over Harry’s face. “What happened to your eye?”

“Clumsy git hit a tree.”

Liam raises an eyebrow then pulls out a thick stack of papers. “Zayn’s coming.” Louis slams his head on the table at which Liam laughs. “Oh, you’re such a drama queen. How’d exams go?”

“Pretty sure I passed,” Louis says brightly. “Thanks to you.”

Liam grumbles out a, “You’re welcome,” and “Don’t expect me to help you again.” Louis ignores the fact that it’s their last year of high school- but, oh, university. Louis scowls to himself.

“Hey.” Louis bites back a groan. Zayn is here. He sits down beside Louis (how _dare_ he?), and tosses a pack of cigarettes on the table. He smells like fresh cigarette smoke and some strong cologne.

“Bet you get lots of girls, smoking those lot.”

“Sure do.” Zayn winks at Louis to which Louis groans dramatically.

“Why do we invite him?”

“He’s my friend,” Liam says.

“Can you believe senior year is almost over?” Zayn asks.

“No,” Liam and Louis both say at once. Harry snickers from his book.

“Poor kid,” Zayn comments. “You have another two years. How will you survive?”

“I don’t know.” Harry sounds surprisingly serious. “I really don’t.”

“Aw, mate, you’ll be fine,” Liam reassures.

Louis doesn’t really like the look on Harry’s face.

^--^

It becomes normal for Harry to hang out with them in the library. He doesn’t talk much, just reads most of the time. His eyes are always smeared with bags, but he always smiles, always reminds Louis of a freshman. Sometimes he brings Niall along, who manages to always look exhausted and done with life.

“You doing all right, Niall?” Liam asks, because Liam just _must_ be a mother hen to every single person he meets, even if they’re strangers.

Niall laughs. “Just got a little over-stressed about exams.” He looks hesitant then says, “What’s the school saying about me?”

Zayn plays with an unlit cigarette then looks up to Niall. “They’re all using you as a reason to protest the overly stressful atmosphere of exam time. You’re a hero.”

It makes Niall laugh and for once, Louis doesn’t exactly hate Zayn.

^--^

Louis hates Zayn, he really does, but sometimes he just can’t help but spill his guts to him. Because Zayn, even with his bad-boy exterior is so calm and quiet. And he listens, man he’ll just _listen_ and observe and you get the feeling he understands everything about you.

“They’re practically forcing me to go to uni.”

Zayn leans against the building, smoking on a cigarette. Louis figures the only reason Zayn gets by with it is because he looks much older than a high schooler.

“Why do you think they’re forcing you?”

“They payed for it, put all that money for me to go. I don’t want to go to uni.”

“Why not give it a try?”

With words like those, Louis remembers why he hates Zayn.

^--^

“Ya’ll wanna go skating?” Harry asks randomly one day with a pencil leaned up against his cheek.

Liam looks up from a stack of job applications and homework. “Huh?”

“It’s an end of year party… I don’t really want to go because I have nobody to take, but you guys could come so…”

Louis smiles. “We all like skating. I’m available any day, anytime.”

“This Monday at 8pm.”

“Cool,” Zayn says. “Give us the flyer and we’ll come.”

How Zayn knew Harry has a small stack of flyers tucked inside his backpack, Louis has no idea.

^--^

It’s probably that night they all realise how incredibly crazy their group looks. Niall looks like a typical nerd- khakis and a polo shirt with thick glasses. Zayn looks like the bad-boy with his leather jacket and ripped skinny jeans. Liam looks like a dad (what else? Louis asks himself), with his shorts and collared shirt. Louis looks like a total prep, with his name-brand cool-kid clothes.

And then Harry looks like a freaking flower child with his baggy sweater and black skinny jeans and stupidly perfect hair. Add a flower crown and you have the living form of a hipster or… something.

“Hey Styles!” some kid yells, waving Harry over. Louis feels pretty cool walking over to the guy, a bunch of seniors looking like they jumped straight from some cliché film.

The guy frowns. “Who’re your friends?”

Harry gestures randomly, listing off their names. Louis can tell the guy isn’t registering any of them.

“Can I talk to you?” the guy asks.

“Sure.” Harry sends an apologetic look their way and goes off with the boy, yanking on his sleeve.

“All right,” Niall says. “Let’s go skate. I bet I’m better than any of you lot!”

Not that Louis’ keeping track, but he falls at least twenty times less than Niall and that’s not including the two times he smashed into the drink dispensers.

^--^

After the party, Louis ~~forces~~ invites them all to go to dinner. So they all go at some old diner and do the most girly thing Louis can think of.

Truth or dare.

“Truth or dare, Li-Li.”

Liam scowls at Louis. “Don’t call me that. Truth.”

Louis sighs. “Live a little.”

“Fine, dare,” Liam says.

“I dare you to dance, right here, right now, to any song you choose on the jukebox.”

Liam picks some dumb song about a hound dog from the little machine in the corner. That’s the night they all find out Liam is actually a pretty good dancer.

^--^

At five in the morning, they decide to leave, all packing up into Liam’s kidnapper van. A name given by Louis himself. Niall passes out instantly in the back, Zayn stares out the window, lit cigarette between his fingers and Harry and Louis sit in the very back. Louis’ sleepy; his head is slowly moving in the direction of the window.

Then out of the blue a panicked voice yells out, “OH NO!”

Liam slams on the brakes, jolting Niall out of his slumber and Zayn to drop his cigarette. Louis stares at Harry with wide and frantic eyes. “What on earth…?”

“Work,” Harry mumbles. He yanks open the door and Liam’s yelling at Harry to get back inside, because _Harry Styles, it is too dangerous to be walking out alone- what the heck are you doing? GET BACK IN HERE!_

But Harry’s running so fast down the roads and they can’t see him anymore and the best they can do is drive home and hope Harry’s safe.

^--^

Louis never really worries. School? Psh, he doesn’t really care. As long as he passes, he’s good. Work? Really, he doesn’t care. People? Screw whatever they think of him. But Harry’s sort of different, because he looks like an average teenager, but something about him is so _old_ and sad.

“You’re gonna graduate soon,” Harry randomly states to the four guys around the table. “You’re so lucky.”

“Not really,” Niall says. “Then we have jobs and have to worry about the real world or whatever.”

Louis grins. “But we’re gonna stay friends like the losers we are.”

Zayn scoffs. “I’m not your friend. You’ve made it quite clear.”

Louis decides he doesn’t really hate Zayn. “Nah, we’re friends.”

Liam looks like an overly proud father.

^--^                    

The day Louis, Liam, Zayn and Niall graduate, Harry is in the audience. He cheers the loudest, even louder than Louis’ parents and that’s a lot.

“You’re awesome,” Harry says. Louis claps him on the back.

“You’re invited to my party. Niall, Liam and Zayn are coming.”

“I have work-“

“Oh, come on Harry,” Louis says. “You don’t really have work that late, do you?” But Louis remembers the night in the van, where Harry leapt out like some crazy person.

“I do,” Harry says quietly.

“Harry… what is your job exactly?”

“Nothing.”

“Then can’t you miss “nothing” for one night?”

Harry looks hesitant then says, “I guess I can miss it one night.”

So he goes to Louis’ party and it’s one of the best thing Louis’ experienced, because all of his idiot friends are around him. But there’s that sinking feeling in his gut, because high school is over, which means _growing up_.

Louis’ not too fond of that.

^--^

The next day he’s sitting in the library. Harry has his usual spot at the table. Upon looking at him, Louis feels a lot like Liam, concerned. Harry wears a button-up pale blue t-shirt, but that’s not what Louis notices. There’s a long and sloppy cut from his nose to his jaw. It’s terrible and puffy and _oh_ Louis doesn’t get how Harry’s just sitting there reading.

“Harry,” Louis says quietly. Harry looks up and grins.

“Your party last night was awesome.”

“Your face…”

“Oh this?” Harry asks as if he even has to freaking ask. “I tripped into the tree last night; it hurt so bad. I thought I would have to get stitches.”

Louis doesn’t believe it. He _can’t_ , because that cut looks awful. “Really?”

“Yeah,” Harry says. “My dad almost called emergency.”

Liam files in and goes all mum on Harry and lists about fifty tips to taking care of the cut. Zayn cocks an eyebrow at Harry’s story and leans back, the observant and calm look on his face. Louis can tell Zayn doesn’t buy his story either, but they don’t say anything.

Niall doesn’t show up.

^--^

Niall doesn’t show up for another week. They all text him worriedly and call him, but nobody replies or picks up. They worry and worry and are half-tempted to just show up at his house until Niall just shows up one day at their usual table. He sits down, looking like he lost half of his body weight and just sits like nothing happened.

Louis’ the first (as usual), to speak. “Where in God’s name have you been?”

Niall smiles slightly. “Hospital,” he mutters.

“What’s going on?” Liam asks. “Is everything all right?”

Niall shrugs. “Just uhm…. got bad again.”

Louis has no clue what on earth it means. But Harry’s looking at Niall like he knows _exactly_ what’s going on.

“You should have called,” Harry says. Niall looks terrified and ashamed.

Zayn flicks at some dust on the table. “Was it like with exams?”

What are they talking about?

“Worse,” Niall mumbles.

Louis feels relieved that Liam looks just as confused.

“Why’re you still doing it?” Harry snaps.

Niall turns dark red. “Stop, I don’t want them to know.”

“I already did,” Zayn says and pulls a cigarette from his box. His voice is so matter-of fact. Niall looks as if he’d rather be anywhere than here.

Louis can’t take it anymore. “Know _what_?”

Niall looks up from staring at the table. He swallows then says. “We’re friends. Right? And you’re not like the jerks in school.”

“Nope,” Zayn says, twirling the cigarette around in his fingers.

“Yeah,” Liam agrees. “We’re not like them.”

“It’s just how I’ve coped,” Niall says softly, “with… stuff. I know it’s bad and it makes my parents so upset, but… yeah.”

The pieces snap together in Louis’ head. He’d somehow forgotten how Niall was teased in fifth year for being “emo.” He’d been hanging out with him so much, the rumours that Niall tore up his thighs after third period had sort of vanished from his min. The thought that the rumours might be true never really occurred to him. It had become almost a tradition for Niall to have nervous breakdowns and Louis never really gave them a second though. That made him feel terribly guilty.

“How long have you done it?” Louis asks.

“I don’t even remember anymore.”

“You’re getting help then, yeah?” Liam asks.

“They’re making me.”

“It’s what’s best for you,” Zayn says. “You don’t think so right now, but you’ll realise it soon enough.”

Louis can’t believe he’s agreeing with Zayn.

^--^

Harry goes back to school and they see less of him. It sucks, because work sucks and university sucks. Harry’s what Louis looks forward to, but he doesn’t even get to see him. Zayn’s outside the library, smoking a cigarette one day and Louis stands beside him. It feels weird. Even though they’re out of school and the social pressure is a little smaller, it’s still weird. He looks like your typical preppy kid and Zayn looks like he came straight out of some motorcycle ad.

“You know, I still hate those,” Louis says, lip curling in disgust at the cigarettes.

Zayn smirks and nods. “I hated them too. My dad smoked ‘em all the time. I swore I’d never smoke, but here I am.”

“Why don’t you quit?”

Zayn shrugs and taps the butt. Ashes scatter in the wind. “Dunno. They’re my way of coping.” He fixes his brown eyes on Louis. Zayn has this way where he looks like he’s reading your soul, collecting all your deepest secrets. The scary thing is, Zayn just observes your secrets. He can sort of just _tell_ what keeps you up at night. “How do you cope?”

Louis shrugs. “I don’t.”

Zayn takes another puff. “I don’t know if that’s worse or better.”

Louis laughs. “Couldn’t agree more.”

^--^

The next time they all see Harry, his arm is broken and he’s got fingerprint-shaped bruises on his cheeks.

“Fell into the tress again?” Louis snaps and he knows it’s mean, knows it’s cruel, but _oh Lord_ , Harry _cannot_ lie his way out of this one.

Harry flinches. He hasn’t even sat down and Louis’ already being a twit.

“Have a seat,” Zayn says, gesturing to an open chair between Niall and Louis. “Believe me, kid, we could use some reports of the school drama because adult drama sucks.”

Thing number seven thousand Louis doesn’t get about Zayn: he calls anyone even one day younger than him “kid.” It’s equal parts stupid and endearing.

“What happened, Harry?” Liam asks in his no-nonsense voice.

“I-“ Harry opens his mouth and he chokes on his own voice. “I need help,” he whispers.

“Tell us what to do,” Zayn says. He’s fiddling idly with his car keys, as if ready to leap into his pickup truck and do whatever the frick Harry wants him to.

“It’s my dad,” Harry says. “I need… I need to get _out_.”

Niall nods. “We’ll help.”

“In anyway,” Liam says.

“Just tell us what to do,” Louis says.

^--^

When they arrive at Harry’s house, the first thing Louis notices is that there is no tree, which makes Louis sadder than it should.

“Go get whatever you need,” Zayn says.

Harry hops out of the pickup truck that he, Louis and Zayn had managed to cram into. Niall and Liam had followed along in Liam’s van.

He walks into the house and Louis watches the door snap behind him. Louis says a silent prayer in his head, because he has no real idea of how bad it is, but Harry’s injuries are bad. And the look on his face is worse.

“You knew,” Louis says quietly to Zayn.

Zayn hums in agreement and lights a cigarette. “I had a feeling. Kid’s dad was a huge drug dealer back in the day. He’d gone to jail twice for domestic abuse.”

“How’d he get to raise Harry?”

“Beats me.” Zayn sighs. “The system sucks? Possibly. Or maybe he beat the system. I don’t have one single bloody clue and I don’t really want to overthink it.”

Louis nods. “Why didn’t you say something?”

“You just don’t spring that on somebody. You wait until they’re ready.”

“What if they’re never ready?”

Zayn sighs again and puts out his cigarette, despite that it’s not even half-finished. “The best thing to do is prod them in the right direction.”

The door opens and Harry grips a duffel bag tightly with his unbroken arm. “Thanks again,” he says as he slides inside and slams the door.”

“No problem,” Zayn says. “We’re all staying over at my place tonight.”

Nobody argues, Louis just texts Liam and Niall to let them know.

^--^

Everybody’s unnaturally quiet and grim at Zayn’s place. Harry leans against the duffel bag with his eyes half-shut. Zayn’s spraying cologne to try and mask the stench of cigarette smoke. Liam, Niall and Louis all stare not-so-subtly at Harry.

Finally, Niall is the one who has the courage to speak. “Are you okay, Harry?”

Harry’s eyes flick open and they roam around the room slowly then he focuses back on Niall. “Yeah.”

Niall walks over and plops down next to Harry. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Dunno,” Harry says and shrugs. He smiles slightly. “But it’s fine now.”

“No,” Niall says. “We have to… We need to figure out what to do.”

Louis doesn’t hear Zayn come up next to him, but he just feels his presence. “Let me show you the guest rooms. There’s only two, so you two’ll have to share one.”

The mood needs to be lightened because everything is sad and heavy. So Louis says, “I call the bed. Liam sleeps on the floor.”

Zayn smirks and Liam rolls his eyes. Niall and Harry don’t even seem to notice anything but each other, talking in hushed angry voices.

“Come on,” Zayn says.

^--^

Louis can’t sleep. He tries, really hard. He closes his eyes, counts in his head, does math, recites crappy poetry, but he can’t fall sleep. The room is too silent, too calm. It’s peaceful and gentle and Louis just doesn’t _get it_.

“Liam,” he hisses into the darkness. He hears blankets shuffle from the floor then Liam pokes his head above the bed.

“What, Louis?”

“Do you think Harry’s okay?”

Liam shrugs. “He will be.”

“Aren’t you scared of being an adult?”

He hears the blankets shift again and he realises Liam is sitting up. “Not really. Are you?”

“Yeah,” Louis whispers. “Wish I wasn’t.”

“We all wish we weren’t scared of what we’re scared of.”

“What’re you scared of?”

Liam laughs. “You.” Louis kicks blindly into the dark. He ends up hitting the wall and whimpering in pain. Liam goes into worry-mode. “You okay?”

“I broke my foot!”

Liam sighs. “You’re fine.”

“Always,” Louis says. “You’re my best friend.”

“Random, but, yeah. You’re mine too.”

“Thanks LiLi.”

“Don’t call me that!”

“Nighty-night, Li-Pea.”

“Louis!”

Louis laughs quietly and finally feels ready to fall asleep.

^--^

The next day, Louis finds out things he doesn’t want to know, things he wishes weren’t true. Things about Harry’s dad, things about Harry and he finally finds out what “work” is. And for once, Louis wishes he’s not in the loop, wishes he could clock out, clock out of being a friend, being a person and living amongst the dirty nasty humans known as Harry Styles father.

“Heroin?” Liam hisses. “Harry, that’s… bad.”

“I couldn’t…” Harry chokes on sobs. “I didn’t want _it_.” And through the laundry lists of “its” Louis isn’t even sure which Harry is talking about.

“How did I not notice?” Niall groans. “How in the-“

“Stop,” Zayn says. He looks grim and serious. “We’re going to figure this out- like adults. And Harry,” Zayn says the words softly, “you’re not an adult yet.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Louis asks.

Zayn sighs. “You were drug into a messy family,” he tells Harry. “That’s not your fault. The drugs and that stuff… you’re out of the house. You have control now. You can get clean.”

“I want to,” Harry says. “I just don’t know how.”

Zayn slips a pack of cigarettes from his pocket. “We’ll contact a rehab center, something like that.” Louis expects Zayn to stick one of the sticks in his mouth, but it surprises him when Zayn tosses the entire box in the trash. “Wouldn’t want to be a hypocrite now, would I?”

Harry smiles slightly. Louis thinks that it’s brighter than the sun.

^--^

Harry spends the rest of his junior year in a drug rehab. Louis doesn’t think he realised just how serious it was until Harry’s actually admitted into an actually _rehab facility_. He’s never been around drugs, met a drug addict or anything of that sort until Harry. And Harry doesn’t really fit into the stereotype he’s seen on cop shows.

After Harry completes the rehab process, he’s put into foster care and sent back to school like a normal kid. Like nothing happened.

“They call me a junkie,” Harry says at the library one day. “They stick fricking needles in my locker. Half of them are hypocrites anyway…”

Zayn chews on a stick of some strong mint gum, which smells really strange in place of the usual cigarette smell. “Ignore them, mate. They’re all childish.”

“Exactly,” Niall says. “High schoolers are stupid.”

Louis snickers. “We act like we weren’t ever in their shoes.”

“We were,” Liam says. “That’s why we can talk about them like that.”

They all laugh and Louis feels more content than he’s ever been in his entire life.

“Young whippersnapper teenagers,” Zayn says with a small smirk.

“Always up to no good,” Niall says, swatting Harry with a book.

“With their cellphones and arrogant ways,” Louis pipes in.

Harry’s laughing so hard he nearly falls out of his chair. “You lot are barely over twenty!”

“Still not teenagers anymore,” Louis says with a wink.

And for once, he’s okay with it. Time’s going on; he’s not a kid anymore. But that’s okay.

It’s okay.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a basic boy™, so I wrote a high school AU. I've spent the last week hunched over this, eyes watering and back aching trying to edit out all my mistakes. I think i got them all, but... if I didn't, please tell me?  
> And tell me what you thought! :) Reviews/critique is always awesome.


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